Prince Michael

Oh yeah... and last weekend Michael went to his homecoming dance and was elected Homecoming Prince by his freshman classmates. Seems he's fitting in quite nicely!

Spirit Week

Oh and last week was spirit week at St. Johns. Tuesday was twin day. Mike and his friend had their picture in the newsletter...

St. Johns Goes Pink

During Spirit Week, Saint John’s designated Wednesday, October 21, as Pink Day in support of National Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Students, faculty, and administrators wore pink to show their support and were asked to donate $1.00 to this worthwhile cause. Through the generosity of the school community, $265.00 was collected and will be donated to The Susan G. Komen for the Cure Foundation.

Fishing!

This year, like the last 2 years, my good friend Danny has taken several of us out on the bay for a day of fishing. It has always been a good time and really has taken my mind off of things.

This year we headed south towards Bloody Point. Unfortunately, the fish were not biting at all that day and we came up empty handed. That gave me a lot of time to take pictures! They are posted on my facebook page. You can see them HERE.

This week wraps up an exciting month for me and my family. Next week brings November and the start of the holiday season. That last 2 have been pretty tough on me especially. I'm quite sure that this season will be a bit different. Life is much, much better with someone in my life to share dreams with...

Catching up and an introduction...

Well it's been a busy couple of weeks around here in the DeWitt household...

Last week I had parent conferences with Michael's teachers at St. Johns. So far everything is going very well. Sure it could be better, but I'll take it over what I've had to deal with the last 2 years in public middle school. He's doing very well in his classes and is making good friends pretty quickly. Never a complaint about school or his uniforms yet. The uniform changes from a polo to a shirt, tie and blazer on November 2nd. The boy will have to learn how to tie his tie!!! We did receive information about lacrosse for the spring season already. Hopefully, things will continue to be positive and he'll play in the spring. It would be a huge boost for him.

Last weekend Tyler drove Mike and I up to Lycoming College to visit Alex on Homecoming Weekend. We got up there and watched her play in an Alumni Game scrimmage. After that we watched the football game with LOTS of people. They still have over 100 players on the team!!! It's amazing to watch. We went to the bullfrog brewery for dinner with her BF Cory and then Tyler drove us home. While at the Bullfrog we did sit right next to the famous comedian Jeffrey Ross. He's the guy who hosts the Comedy Central Celebrity Roasts. Nice guy. He actually went out later that night to the local night club as well. I wasn't there but Alex saw him. Here are pictures from the weekend.

Since we were gone all day Chloe was home alone so my new found friend, Heather (did I mention her?), and her daughters came over during the day to let her out and play with her. They as well as Chloe had a great time together. They played with her for a long time.

This past Friday Tyler attended the Linganore High homecoming (not his HS) with a girl. He and his good friend Tanner went together. They had a good time and got home pretty late I might add. We discussed that the next day. The homecoming dance for his high school is coming up in November and Michael's is this Saturday! Boys are so easy to get ready. When Alex went it was an all day ordeal to get ready. Not with the boys...

Saturday was a terrible weather day. It rained all day. That morning however was the Frederick Pink Ribbon 5K in downtown. Some good friends of mine told me that they were going to see their son run in the 5k. His very first one at that. I told them I would meet them down there that morning. Proceeds for the weekend and the run supported teh Hurwitz Breast Cancer Fund in Frederick. A fund where money stays locally supporting those in need. Heather and I (did I mention her?) got there early and found my friends so we saw the opening ceremony. Chris's name was written on the remembrance banner and pink was flowing everywhere! We all walked (in the rain) around the block and saw my friend's son run the race. It was really great. You know, the weather was miserable, but that did nothing to lower the spirits of the runners and the people in attendance. It was a great event. After the race we all went out to breakfast to a wonderful coffee shop in Frederick called Cafe Nola. Breakfast was great and my friends had the chance to chat with Heather for awhile and get to know her.

So... yes I am dating someone and her name is Heather. She is a beautiful and wonderful woman that actually found out about me from reading my blog(s). She read my story and sent me a very nice email about how much she admired what I had done and that she too was going through something similar. I replied back, thanking her, and thought that was it. The next day she sent another email asking me if I would like to have coffee and chat about our experiences of both being solo parents. That got my head and my emotions spinning for sure. It was a very difficult decision for me to make. Difficult then, but not any longer.

We've gone out several times and have really enjoyed one another's company. We have a great deal in common and that has made things very comfortable and easy for us to get to know one another. She has 3 children as well, 2 of which are the same age as Tyler and Michael and they know one another from school. Her 3rd child is an adorable 5 year old girl!!! Both her children and mine are doing well with us seeing one another. I know Tyler and Mike have been able to see a huge difference in me during the past 6 weeks. I feel good and I'm happy and that makes them feel the same. Our household has dramatically changed for the better. So that said, I don't know what my future holds. Who does though? I do know that I have taken control of MY LIFE and started steering it in a new direction. I've spent the last 5 years of my life dedicated to taking care of my family and have finally made the realization that I need to look out for myself as well. Thanks to everyone for the well wishes for Heather and I. They mean a LOT!!! Life is changing... and changing for the better...

An anonymous post...

This message came to me from an unknown person who read my guest blog post last week:

Charlie, what a heart warming and touching post. I don't think that getting back your life after this much time has passed is selfish at ALL. You've earned it, but more than that, life is about living and living the best life we can.

From what I've read here about Christine she was blessed to have you and the children. She will have known your love and your support and that the 4 of you would be in good hands when she was no longer with you, because you had one another and you stepping up as both dad and mom made a huge difference for your children.

When I was diagnosed in May 2005 I felt the impact on my husband and my 2 boys (17 and 13). And the reality is while the cancer is happening to the person diagnosed you speak so well to the fact that it affects everyone in their own way.

You sound like you are on more solid ground these days, moving forward and I hear laughter in this -- we need it constantly, even at the worst of times. Wishing you and your children abundant lives!

Guest Blogger...

Today I am the guest blogger on the Blogging for Boobs site...
Check it out.

Nice Hair Ty!

Well for most of you out there who follow me you know what today is. It "would" have been my 24th wedding anniversary. Hard to believe that it has been 24 years. The last couple have been pretty tough on me but as time has gone by this one has come and almost gone uneventfully.

It's different now as I feel that a wedding anniversary is something that is celebrated by husband and wife. Chris and I celebrated 21 times! That's pretty good. This date from now on is simply a reminder that I was married on this date many years ago. I don't think that I will be able to celebrate it again. But, I'll certainly remember it.

Today was a very nice day outside. My newfound friend kept in touch with me today as she knew what today was and wanted to make sure that everything was okay. And it really was. My life is different now and with this new change of happiness and I'm really enjoying it and getting through the days much easier now.

Oh you gotta love the picture!!! This comparison is of my son Tyler and a picture of me from an ID taken back in 1980. The hair similarity is uncanny!!!

Breast Cancer Awareness Rant

Sorry I haven't posted much in a while. I've been pretty busy on the homefront. Michael's doing well in private school and Tyler's doing well in school as well. He could use a JOB (hint)...

Remembering what I wrote back in the 14th I have taken my life in a new direction. I will not go into details, but a few weeks back I met a total stranger for coffee one morning. She invited me via email and after many anxious moments I accepted. You see she actually found out about me through my BLOG! We have an enormous amount in common, the number one being we are both solo-parents. We are now dating (man that's hard to say) on a regular basis! I've found happiness again in my life, but I tell you it's been very interesting trying to date at my age. Oh its fun, but I found myself very nervous at times. Most of the rust has fallen off and now we are having fun and enjoying one anothers company. I'll keep you posted.

NOW - October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. I really love the concept which hopefully brings awareness to everyone to get tested early and often. What actually BURNS me to the core is how virtually ALL retailers use this month to their own advantage! This is just crap.

Here's food for thought - "if shopping could cure breast cancer it would be cured by now!"

I was in the local grocery store last night, and right by the front door at the bakery section there were tons of pink cakes, and cupcakes and all other sorts of goodies. All emblazoned with pink icing and pink breast cancer ribbons. What a bunch of BS. You really think any of that money goes to some breast cancer foundation? If it does then all they do is jack the price up on it to cover it. This does not matter if it is a cake, mixer, blender, shoes, anything. Instead, just find a great research or support organization and send them a check. That money goes SO much further than the tiny amount that comes from the commercialization of the disease by companies like my grocery store!!! Not to mention, YOU get to pick where your money goes, and YOU get to take the deduction off your taxes. Not the corporation.

So if you need pink cupcakes this month, certainly buy these, but if you just want cupcakes don't get swindled into buying the pink ones thinking your extra money is going to make a difference. It won't.... Write a check instead...

The picture you see is from this years 2009 Frederick Keys Calendar. It was from last years first breast cancer awareness night. Sure, they profit from it by having more people in the stands. Many of those people are people that have had their lives ripped apart by cancer in some form or fashion. Many of them are survivors and are recognized by everyone their. The club raises money for my kids trust fund and also raises money for the American Cancer Society. They do it right.

Back to School Night

Last night was back to school night at Saint John's where Michael now attends high school. He has really adapted quite well so far. It was fun going from class to class to see what his day to day is like. He has 8 classes + lunch each day. Most are 45 mins in length. Class size is just perfect, no more than 20 in in most, 11 in Math, 3 in art, 18 in Spanish. A far cry from the 33 when he was in middle school.

Tonight we'll be going to their football game again in Frederick. We went last week and had a pretty good time. Tyler and I sat together and Mike went off with his new St. Johns friends. Nice to see him adjusting so well.

The daily routine is okay so far, we leave at 7:20am and he's there by 7:40. I either stay out for coffee or come right home (back by 8:00). Pick up is around 3:00 and that's been okay so far. Some days I forget and leave a little later but he's always got the chance to stay after so it's not a problem.

So far... very good. No regrets!

Blogging for Boobs

I've been invited to be a guest blogger on a special blog site. This came to me out of the blue but I'm honored to be included. I'll let you all know when my post is up there...

Our basement redo is finally done!

We finally got around to putting the finishing touches on the basement redo. New chairs have arrived and been installed for our sitting pleasure!

You can check out all the pictures here...

Year 3 begins...

All I can say is wow. These past few days have been a real whirlwind of activity on my emotions. It's hard to put it all in perspective right now. Friday was a rainy, dismal day. I dropped Michael off at school and then went by the cemetery early in the morning. I took a dozen roses Chris's gravesite and propped them up against her headstone. They were nice but in a way meaningless.

What Chrissy and I had will stay with me forever, and nothing will ever change that. Absolutely nothing. When I lost her I lost a huge part of me. The past 2 years I have been focused solely on Alex, Tyler and Michael and nothing else. I owe it to her to do everything I can to make sure the kids grow up safe, and become fine young adults in both her image as well as my own.

Friday, Alex came home as well and the 4 of us sort of just were with each other, quiet but understanding what each one of us was dealing with. She came home because Chris's little brother Joey was getting married on Saturday. We all went and I found it very, very difficult to listen to the vows being said. It reminded me again of what I have lost, but at the same time it also reminded me of what I was able to cherish for the years that we were together. We had wonderful lives together. It's just that in our case we had a limited amount of time together. I would never trade those years in for anything.

I've been so focused on them I've neglected myself. Both physically and emotionally. I have continually suffered from gastrointestinal issues. Just went to the Dr. this morning in fact. Next test will be an upper endoscopy that also uses an ultrasound looking for issues. It's called and endoscopic ultrasound. That'll be in a few weeks so I'll have to start juggling rides and stuff soon. I'm doing okay but I tell you with stress and all that I carry it really flares up sometimes.

The past 6 months or so I've really had my emotions bottled up. Friday I opened the bottle and spilled them all over. I was home alone most of the day and did a great deal of soul searching and thinking about myself. I have to.... I've promised myself that the coming year will be better. Not sure exactly how, but I have some ideas. Exercise, better eating, and new friends may be just the answer. All I do know is that it sure won't hurt!

So... I will continue on down the path that God has shown me. My life is what it is and I cannot change the past, but I do know that I can control my future. I think I've finally started to accept that, and I pray to God that he guides me to make the right decisions in my life as the future comes at me so fast! The past 2 years have gone by in the blink of an eye. I'll never get them back. So now it's full steam ahead... wish me luck and say a prayer for me!!! And I will quote my dearly departed wife “You know, sometimes in life you just have to jump in and get wet.”

Well look out. I'm getting a running start....

A special thanks to each and everyone of you who have helped me during my journey. I could not have made it this far without your the caring, love, and understanding that you've given me.

Thank you...

Oh and one other thing... I can see from my site statistics that there has been a lot of activity on the site the last week. There's 20 or 30 of you out there regularly checking in on me not to mention the new people that arrive each day. Today I received the following email from a site owner that I borrowed a picture from. Seems as if when you click the picture he was actually getting hits on his site. He couldn't figure it out. He did look at my site and sent the following:

Charlie,

As I look through the information on the back end of my website I consistently
see hits coming via your website. I see the "french fries picture" which you somehow copied directly from my site (it's okay I don't mind. As a matter of fact thanks to photoshop it no longer has the golden arches on them.) I'm puzzled though as to how and why viewers are coming from your site to mine. Perhaps when you get a minute you can enlighten me if you know the answer.

By the way, your site is a magnificent way to keep the memories of such a wonderful woman alive!

I commend you.

Many Thanks,

Sam Wernick
General Manager
All American Baseball Academy

Wonderful words from an absolute stranger... nice.

2 years ago today...

Concert picture

Wednesday night my friend Greg took me to a concert in Baltimore. We went and saw Journey with opening band Night Ranger. Both were excellent. The tickets and hospitality helped clear my mind some from the week at hand.

Alex's early games next year

Alex will be playing at McDaniel College in Westminster on Feb 27th.

Also her team will be having a pink out game at Lycoming on Sat April 10th with proceeds going to Climb for Hope in honor of Chris.


Just wanted to put those dates out there in case anyone wanted to attend. I will be at both of these games for sure.

Hell week....

Well as you all know 9/11 is fast approaching. This week, 2 years ago, was an incredible blur. I can relive each day vividly in my mind. Friday will be a tough day for all of us and I just ask that you all keep us in your thoughts.

Alex will be coming home on Friday as Saturday is Chris's little brother's wedding. A joyous occasion for sure. She would certainly be very proud of both he and his wife-to-be.

Tomorrow I was invited to go to a concert with my friend Greg. It should be a good time and hopefully will take my mind off of the rest of the week. We'll see. Hopefully I'll get a picture or 2 as well.

I also, made a new friend today...

Ty's picture

Ty's picture is used on the youth ministry site at st. johns...

Check it out HERE>

Little League World Series

Sunday was an exceptionally busy day. The boys and I were planning on going to Williamport, PA and bring Alex's things for college up to her. At the same time she was able to get us "Friends and Family" passes to the Little League World Series games and VIP tent. Nice!!!!

Until, they announced on Saturday that VP Joe Biden was coming!@!!@#$!$#@$! ESPN had to revoke all F&F passes for the day for security purposes. We were going to be left out in the cold... The lady at ESPN that Alex works for knew that we were coming just for that so she secured us 3 regular seats in the VIP ESPN section right near home plate!!!!

So, we left early Sunday morning and Tyler drove us the entire way up there. That was nice as I could drink coffee, read the newspaper, and relax the whole way.... NOT!!!!! He's a good driver, but I have to pay more attention when he's driving than if I drive.

We got there around 11 and went in and found Alex in Volunteer Stadium where the consolation game was being held. She had on her credentials and was working with a camera crew getting shots of people in the stands. It was fun watching her work.

After that game Alex was able to take us to one of the concession stands and get us lunch on ESPN. She just showed her badge and that was it, so we ate a good lunch! Sorry your ESPN cable fees will probably go up next month...

We had to go into the championship game early because the VP was coming. The boys and I went in and Alex and Cory went out to the outfield. The seats were just perfect. Under cover, and not that far from home plate. A great view of the game.

We saw some famous folks as well, Brent Musburger, Joe Biden, Jared from Subway, Moses Arias from Hannah Montannah's show, and Orel Hershiser! The game was great and the US won in a pretty close battle over Taiwan.

After the game the boys and I drove to Lycoming and moved in Alex's things into her dorm. She's in a new housing area that has 2 bedrooms, and a large kitchen/lounge area. It's a really nice setup. We stayed for an hour and chatted with her roomates who are on the lacrosse team and then finally took off for home. It was a busy day but memorable none the less...

Pictures for the Championship game can be found on my facebook page located HERE.
Pictures for the Consolation game are HERE.

Yeah I'm still here...

This picture was taken on the day we got Chloe. It was a surprise party for Chrissy's birthday and Alex's freshman year. September 2006.

Lots of things going on. Alex is at school but classes don't start until Monday. She's been up there for about 10 days. She is working for ESPN at the Little League World Series that is held there. She's working directly with a camera guy that shoots shots of people in the stands during the game. She was able to secure ESPN Friends and Family passes for the boys and I so we are going to the championship game tomorrow (sunday). We're taking her things up there to her as well so it will be a busy day!

Tyler started 11th grade this past monday. All things working out well so far. He also had to work 3 days this week after school at the golf course. He's able to get a ride from school with a friend and I pick him up later in the evening.

Michael went to his Freshman orientation for St. Johns. They spent 1/2 a day at school followed by an overnight retreat up in Emmitsburg, MD. They were able to meet and greet with all their freshman classmates as well as do a quick run through of their classes. He has 15 people in his English class and 3 people in his Art class. A lot better than the 35 he had last year. My fingers are crossed that this is the right choice for him. He's ready to go. I'll get some pics next week on Tuesday which is his official 1st day of school.

Me? Well this week I finished my 8-week Young Widow/Widowers group at the Hospice. It was a very emotional meeting as we all brought in pictures of our spouses and children to share with the group. The group was helpful as it reinforced the fact that I am not alone in this journey and that many others are dealing with the same issues as I.

Health? I WAS feeling pretty good for a couple of weeks. Vacation was good and the week after as well. Then all of a sudden I started getting pain again this past Monday. It has tapered off as of yesterday so we'll see how it goes.